


When We Were Young

by scarletwanda



Category: Marvel (Comics), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers Family, Avengers Tower, Big Brother Bucky Barnes, Birthday Party, Character Death, F/F, Hiding, Presumed Dead, Protective Bucky Barnes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-25
Updated: 2019-08-25
Packaged: 2020-09-26 07:21:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 7
Words: 10,137
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20385862
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scarletwanda/pseuds/scarletwanda
Summary: you and wanda grew up together as kids and fell in love with each other as teenagers. how can you go on when the  world pulls you apart before you can act on your feelings?





	1. Prologue

They spent their adolescence running around a concrete building. The cold walls never quite feeling like home. All of them burdened with powers they couldn’t control just yet. Inside the grey compound ran three little kids, one of them so fast he could barely be seen by the naked eye. The other two ran after him, giggling at their companion. The two girls held hands as they ran.

They were allowed outside of their respective rooms once a day. An hour long the three of them would run around inseparable. The boy always making the girls laugh, his white hair rushing in the wind as he ran at full speed. The girls left behind running, trying to catch up, when a voice ran through the empty hallway: ‘It’s 7 o’clock, please return to your chambers at once.’ They stopped in their tracks. Waiting for the boy to come back before walking towards their rooms together.

Stopping in front of the boy’s room, the girls said goodnight. The room next to the boys belonged to one of the girls. Still holding hands, they gave each other a hug, before finally letting go. The girl walked into the room, her red hair swaying behind her. She turned around one last time and looked at the girl in front of her. ‘Goodnight Y/N.’ The door slowly started to close, but no one was touching it. But the girl knew who was doing it, it was one of her favorite tricks. She smiled as the door fully closed. ‘Goodnight Wanda.’

—

‘Come in!’ The door to your bedroom opened slightly, Wanda’s head poking in. ‘Dinner is ready.’ You put your pen down, closing your notebook. ‘Coming.’ You jumped out of bed and followed her down the hallway into the kitchen, where a very long table was set with a variety of foods and drinks. Steve was already at the table, talking to Bucky about this old movie he’d checked out for the first time. ‘I’m telling you Buck,_ The Shining_ is a really good movie!’ Sam was next to them, shaking his head and laughing. Next to Sam where Natasha and Clint, talking about Clint’s kids and their latest pranks, Natasha had never looked more proud.

Maria and Carol were talking to Fury, you couldn’t quite make out what their conversation was about. Last ones at the table were Thor, Bruce and Peter, Peter was proudly telling Bruce all about his new science project at school, Thor was nodding along, but you were sure he had no clue what Peter was talking about. Tony was still in the kitchen, preparing the last few dishes. You took your regular seat next to Wanda, opposite Pietro, who joined the table a minute later.

It had been a long time since you walked the halls of Strucker’s compound. And a lot had changed since then. You had joined the avengers, helping them put an end to Ultron. Your looks were the only things that hadn’t changed, Pietro still had a head full of white hair. Wanda’s hair was still as fiery as her power. You had grown up together, gone through hell and back together. And that became your keyword: together. The three of you joined the avengers, but didn’t give them your trust right away. Now, years later, they had become your little family. The one thing you had lacked throughout your lives.

—

Wanda was perhaps the strongest out of the three of them, maybe even the strongest out of all of them. But her powers couldn’t fix everything for her, they couldn’t fight every battle for her. She mind was consumed with one thought and one thought only: you. You were the only constant she had, besides her brother. You stood by her through everything. You swore to get revenge on Stark for making her an orphan, you comforted her when the experiments had gone too far, you were her everything. The older you got, the stronger the feelings became. She had never been more grateful that no one else on the team could read minds.

Although that didn’t matter much, cause even without the ability to read minds Pietro knew exactly what was going on with his sister. He called it ‘the twin thing’ when he first confronted her about her feelings. But even with all Pietro’s persuading, Wanda couldn’t get herself to admit her feelings for you. Afraid that she’d lose the one person in the world that could make her feel at home. It didn’t matter to her if she couldn’t have you in her life like that, as long as she had you in her life someway.

—

The table had looked beautiful arriving to dinner, large candle sticks in the middle to set the mood, beautifully laid out plates and wine glasses, food prepared in the most ravishing ways. Now it looked an absolute mess. Pots, pans and bowls were placed randomly wherever someone saw an empty space, the contents completely erased. Napkins and cutlery strewn across the once shiny white plates. Wine glasses almost empty.

Most were still making conversation, others were laid back in their chair trying to get the food to quietly settle in their stomachs without throwing up. Pietro had started to talk to Peter, you had your arm thrown around Wanda’s chair. ‘I’m so full I think I might have to sleep on this chair tonight.’ Wanda chuckled, looking at you out of the corner of her eyes. ‘My room is closer, if you can make it you can crash with me.’ Her Sokovian accent very thick, a sign she was starting to get tired. ‘Yes please! But we gotta go now, if I wait any longer you’ll have to carry me.’

You bid the others goodnight, catching Pietro giving Wanda a look you couldn’t place. Furrowing your brows you walked off with Wanda, who had gotten a red tint after Pietro’s look, eventually reaching her bedroom. You quickly got rid of your clothes and threw on some sweats, plopping down on Wanda’s bed. Getting under the covers you held out your arms, gesturing for Wanda to climb in bed with you. She smiled shyly before getting into bed, also with her pj’s on now, and cuddled up to your side. You felt your eyes get heavy already, almost falling into a deep sleep, until you felt a draft. ‘Ugh we forgot to close the door.’ You groaned. Then the door sarted slowly closing, seemingly on its own. You smiled, it was still one of your favorite tricks. A small voice coming from upon your chest: ‘Goodnight Y/N.’ You kissed her temple before closing your eyes; ‘Goodnight Wanda.’


	2. Chapter One

It was May 29th. You were standing in the living room of Stark Tower. Around you were people in full feather. Men in sharp suits, women in fancy dresses. All there to celebrate the birthday of the legendary Tony Stark. Next to you came the clinking of glasses, a sound you barely heard over the loud music.   
  
Tony was standing near the bar, adamantly telling a story to a couple of people staring at him in awe. Pepper by his side, a slight smile on her face. You couldn’t hear what he was saying, but based on the faces these people were making it was another iron man anecdote.   
  
A couple feet away from Tony stood Steve. Dressed in some casual attire, holding a beverage. He was making conversation with Sam. Next to them stood Bucky, looking tense. He always hated social gatherings, feeling like he couldn’t breathe, like he was surrounded. You spotted various other Avengers in your quick scan of the room. Eventually spotting Wanda standing near the bar on the far left of the room, watching the view while she waited for her drink. You made your way over there.   
  
‘Hey beautiful.’ You said.  
  
She turned around at the sound of your voice, the corners of her mouth going up at the nickname. ‘Hey.’ She answered, her voice content.   
  
‘You enjoying yourself over here?’ ‘I am now.’ She grinned. At that moment bartender came over and put a drink in front of her, a mojito. You quickly asked the bartender for a scotch on the rocks with a twist before you turned your attention to Wanda again. ‘Does you ordering that drink mean I’m gonna have to carry you to bed tonight?’ You raised your eyebrows while looking at the drink.   
  
‘That happened once. Cocktails are dangerous. They taste like juice and then all of a sudden you can’t walk.’ You burst out laughing, Wanda joining you.   
  
‘Where’s Pietro?’ Wanda raised the drink to her lips, taking a small sip while pointing to the other side of the room. Your gaze followed to where she was pointing. Your eyes landing on a head full of white hair. There was Pietro, dressed in a tux, talking to some girl. He kept leaning in closer. And the girl seemed to like it, she kept laughing at everything he said, touching his arm every now and then.   
  
‘Looks like someone is gonna get some tonight.’ You turned back to Wanda.  
  
‘I hope not, we share a wall.’ You smiled, partially at the joke, partially at her accent. It was like music to your ears, her voice always reassuring you.   
  
The bartender brought you your drink. And you and Wanda decided you should go mingle. Talking to different journalist, friends, and other acquaintances of Tony’s. After a couple of hour you find yourself on a couch that was pushed against the large windows before the party started.   
  
You were talking about the party, that it was fun but that you were tired of the making the same small talk with everyone. You were talking about what everyone was wearing. About how different the Avengers were at parties as opposed to when they just woke up. About how funny it was that James was telling the same War Machine story for the umpteenth time, looking very proud when he earned lots of laughs when he finished. About Pietro, who had moved on from talking to the girl and was now in a full on face battle with her. Wanda cringed at the sight of her brother, quickly turning the conversation to Bucky, who had managed to slip away from the party.   
  
You were having a great time. You weren’t tired yet, and you always loved hanging out with Wanda. Your story wasn’t that of any two teenagers, and everything that happened since you met was far from normal. But that didn’t matter to you. Cause you wouldn’t change it for the world. You were comfortable around her, you trusted her, you could be yourself around her. And although you were sitting on a couch that most people could pay off their student loans with, sitting on it and laughing with Wanda about Steve’s awkward attempt at flirting with Sharon actually felt like a very normal thing to do.   
  
The night wore on, and the party was still in full swing. A quick glance at the clock told you it was almost 1 am. By now you and Wanda had knocked back quite a few drinks, and you unconsciously started to follow Pietro’s ways. You were still sitting on the couch, but you were sitting considerably closer to each other than when you first sat down. You had one leg up on the couch, Wanda’s hand rested on your knee. You had your elbow on the back of the couch, supporting your tipsy head with your hand. Your face close enough to Wanda’s that you felt her breath every time she let out even so much as a chuckle.   
  
You and Wanda had drifted closer and closer to each other since you met when you were kids. You had been through a lot with each other. Up until the point where you joined the Avengers. By now you trusted all of the other team members with your life, but after everything that happened it was hard to trust them at first. The only person you trusted was Wanda. She could write an entire manual on how to treat you in different situations. Knowing exactly what to do when you were sad, mad, happy. Knowing how to comfort you in every situation possible.

With every one of those emotions you needed something different, but you also always needed one and the same thing: Wanda. You held hands, watched movies, sat in silence while enjoying each other’s company, you slept in the same bed, took care of each other when you were sick or hurt. She was everything you ever needed.   
  
Wanda laughed at one of your jokes before looking over at you. Her eyes shining in the moonlight that came in through the windows. You lost yourself in the green of her eyes. The color reminding you of moss growing on big trees in beautiful forests, of fresh and delicious apples, of lucky clovers, of the little mint leaves left behind in her latest mojito. She was staring at you too, her gaze holding a certain intensity, an emotion you couldn’t quite place.   
  
Neither of you were looking away. You shot a quick glance towards her lips, before looking at her eyes again. She was still looking at you, but it seemed that she was closer than before. She was leaning in, you started to move too. Your lips inches away from each other. Her breath ghosting over your mouth. Your eyes still open, waiting for a sign that she wanted to back out, that she didn’t want to cross this line. But the sign never came. So you leaned in further. Your lips about to touch…   
  
‘GET DOWN!’   
  
Suddenly an ear deafening sound filled the room. The windows came down rapidly. The whole tower shook. A grenade had hit the tower from across the road. The explosion causing people to fly across the room. Fog filled the open space. For a second there’s a dead silence. The silence more deafening than the explosion. You looked up slowly, the impact had thrown you across the room. Every bone, every muscle in your body screamed at you to stay still. But you had to know where Wanda was. You had to know if she was okay. The silence was ending, slowly making place for a loud ringing in your ear, for people screaming murder all around you, for gunshots. Gunshots. The attackers weren’t done yet. The grenade was just a way in. The room was filled with smoke, people running around like headless chickens. People yelling. There was wreckage everywhere. People were on the floor, lifeless. Smoke still made it hard to see ahead.   
  
There was a flash that kept flying across the room, Pietro. He was taking people out as fast as he could. You couldn’t see anyone else. You couldn’t see Wanda. Where the fuck is she. You had to know that she was okay. But as soon as you started to get up two arms grabbed you around your waist and pulled you up. Carrying you towards the exit. Your savior whispered in your ears, ‘it’s okay, I got you’, over and over again like a broken record. You recognized his voice, Bucky. You couldn’t say anything, but you had to protest.   
  
After a couple attempts you finally got out the name ‘Wanda’. You said it again and again so Bucky would know you had to look for her. You had to go back. And then you spotted her.   
  
She was a few feet away from the couch you had vacated the whole night. Lying lifeless in a puddle of blood. It was like every fiber in your being got new energy. You fought against Bucky’s grip and got loose. Running across the room, through the gunfire, towards Wanda’s broken form. You heard Bucky yell your name from behind you. But standing next to Wanda, her hair over her face, scrapes; bruises; blood, covering her every inch of her. Bucky was still yelling at you, Steve had joined in. Around you people were clutching other bodies, screaming, crying. But everything else was just background. You fell to your knees, pushing Wanda’s hair out of her face.   
  
And you sobbed. You clutches the sweater she was wearing and put your head on her stomach. And you sobbed. This couldn’t be it. You had been so close to your first kiss with Wanda. You had been so close to getting what you were afraid of having for all these years. This couldn’t be how your story ended. You felt Bucky’s arms wrap around your waist once again, pulling you away from Wanda. You started screaming, still sobbing, fighting against Bucky. It took him a lot, but he pulled you off and started running towards the stairs with you still trying to punch your way out of his grip. Steve picked up Wanda, and started making his way out of the room through the still firing shots. Everything was becoming hazy, going by like a blur, you didn’t know where you were going and you didn’t care. Letting Bucky do the work for you. You stopped fighting him, your screaming and sobbing slowing down, the fatigue of your wounded body finally catching up. And you let darkness take over. 


	3. Chapter Two

_Day 14._ You slowly opened your eyes. You blinked a few times to adjust to the light before finally seeing the faint yellow ceiling clearly. You looked around the room. _That fucking room_. The room you’d first woken up in two weeks ago. A morning after the attack. You woke up at the crack of dawn, you had slept maybe an hour. The image of Wanda’s lifeless body on the floor creeping back into your mind every time you closed your eyes.

You groaned and rolled out of bed, making your way towards the kitchen. Bucky was already up, sipping on a cup of coffee, seemingly deep in thought.

‘Any news?’

You asked for news every morning, knowing you’d get the same shake of Bucky’s head every time you asked. After the attack all the avengers were split up and sent to safe houses. You and Bucky were in a safe house somewhere upstate, so secret _you_ didn’t even know where you were.

You weren’t allowed to contact anyone, not that you could if you wanted to. There were no phones, no newspapers, no tv, no radio, no form of communication whatsoever. The car that dropped you off in the absolute middle of nowhere hadn’t come back. You were stuck and slowly losing your mind.

Once again your question was answered with a shake of Bucky’s head, he poured you a cup of coffee and set it down on the kitchen island. You sat on one of the bar stools and put your elbows on the slightly cracked surface, your head in your hands.

‘How long are we gonna have to stay here?’

‘I don’t know.’

‘When will someone come tell us?’

‘I don’t know.’

‘Is everyone else okay?’

‘I don’t know.’

You groaned and ran a hand through your hair. Bucky looked up at you.

‘How can they just leave us here with absolutely no information?’

‘It was a surprise attack, their first priority was to get us to safety. We just have to be patient.’

‘Yeah well I don’t want to be.’

‘Y/N..’

You slammed a hand on the table and stood up.

‘What Bucky? Are you honestly telling me you’re not going insane in here? Not knowing what happened? Not knowing where everyone else is? If everyone else is okay? If they’re even alive?! We’ve been here for two weeks and no one has told us a goddamn thing! What about the people that died! What about Wanda! I couldn’t even say goodbye to her!’

Bucky just stood there and let you vent. He knew you weren’t angry at him, he was probably the only reason you’d stayed as calm as you could. But he’d seen your reaction when you saw Wanda. The broken expression on your face, the gut wrenching scream you let out. He could only imagine what that must have felt like for you. You never got closure and it was eating away at you. He just rounded the island and put his arm around you. Sobs coming out of your mouth so fast you didn’t even have time to breath in between. Tears staining his shirt but he didn’t care. He just slowly caressed your hair until your sobs died out.

_Day 15_. You and Bucky had played some games you found in one of the closets of the house. He taught you a card game him and Steve used to play all the time as kids. You won round after round. By the end you were even laughing. He didn’t have the heart to tell you he let you win.

_Day 16_. In between the rations of food stored in the garage you found cake mix. You and Bucky spent the afternoon baking, trying to keep your mind off things.

_Days 17_. You went outside and took a walk in the woods adjacent to your house. The fresh air making you feel better. You walked the path for about an hour just listening to the birds chirping, the leaves crunching under your feet. For a second you almost felt at peace, but Wanda entered your mind again. You went back inside and stayed in bed for the rest of the night.

_Day 18_. The aggravation started to make its way back to the surface. You loved Bucky, but if you had to play another game of cards you’d jump out of the window. How much longer would you have to stay here?

_Day 31_. A month. A whole month you’d spend in this house with absolutely nothing to take your mind off things. You’d slowly given up hope to receive good news. Instead wishing whoever was coming after you would just find you and finish the job already. _At least I’d be with Wanda again_, you kept thinking.

You were on the couch with Bucky, he was reading a book he found upstairs. You were staring at the ceiling, trying to see shapes in the cracked paint until you heard a knock at the door. You jumped up so fast you got dizzy. You looked at Bucky and Bucky looked back at you. You wanted to run to the door but you knew safety came first. Bucky got the gun from the drawer and motioned for you to be silent. You followed him to the door. He stood in front of it, gun raised.

‘Who is it?’

‘It’s Fury.’

‘Tell me something no one else would know.’

‘If toast is cut diagonally, I can’t eat it.’

Bucky lowered the gun and opened the door. Fury stepped inside, his long black coat sweeping behind him.

You wanted to start yelling, ask him what took him so fucking long, why no one contacted them before, where everyone else was, when you could leave. But you opted to stay quiet, you wanted to hear what he had to say first.

Fury and Bucky sat down at the table. You didn’t sit. You leaned both your hands on the table. Turning your full attention to Fury, who stayed quiet. Much to your annoyance.

‘Well?!’ You asked

Fury looked between you and Bucky and sighed.

‘It was Rumlow and his guys, they’re still out there. We have no idea where they are. Until we catch them no one gets out of their safe houses.’

You closed your eyes and hung your head letting out a long sigh. Great, you had to spend even more time in here.

‘What about the death count?’ Bucky asked, expression concerned, not sure if he was ready for the answer.

‘28 dead. 47 injured.’

‘Who are they?’

‘I don’t know.’

‘What do you mean you don’t know? How can you not know?’ You asked, straightening out. You were getting sick of those three words. How can no one know anything about an attack this big, surely someone had to have answers.

‘The injured were taken to special safe houses, the bodies taken to a morgue. I didn’t get names, just locations. You guys are the firsts ones I’m seeing. Whoever is inside is as much of a mystery to me as it is to you.’

You ran a hand through your hair and started pacing, if only he would’ve visited you last. You thoughts wandering to your fellow teammates. Steve, Sam, Nat, Pietro. Where are they? Are they okay? Do they think you’re dead?

Fury and Bucky were still talking when Fury got up to leave.

‘What about communication? I’m not gonna sit here for another month not knowing what is going on. I need news.’

‘I can’t leave any kind of device that’s traceable. It’s too much of a risk. I’ll be back soon.’

_Soon_, you thought. _What’s soon in the eyes of Nick Fury?_


	4. Chapter Three

Day 46. You made a mental note to stop counting the days. The ever rising number only making you feel more suffocated. Fury said he’d be back soon. But you were two weeks in and there was still no sign of him.

Bucky kept himself busy around the house. He didn’t seem to be that bothered by the lack of news, or the fact that you’d been stuck in this house for almost two months. You wondered if it was because of all the hiding he had to do as the Winter Soldier, or if it bothered him as much as it bothered you and he just didn’t show it.

You stepped out onto the back porch. The weather had started to turn warmer. The sun spreading a warmth through your body. You closed your eyes and took a deep breath. Sitting down on the porch swing you lightly rocked back and forth. You started watching birds flying by until your attention was caught by three squirrels. They were chasing each other around the tree, one of them significantly faster than the other two. You smiled, they reminded you of you and the twins when you were kids. Always running around trying to chase each other. Even then Pietro was much faster than you two. You let your thoughts wander to the fond memories you had with them.

—

You were 7 years old. You were playing hide and seek. Having found Wanda already you teamed up to find Pietro who, without either of you noticing, kept quickly changing spots so you wouldn’t find him.

You guys eventually got close enough that he couldn’t run away quickly, so he jumped out from behind the curtain where he’d been hiding. You and Wanda screamed and Pietro starting chasing you. The three of you laughing and yelling until you ran into Strucker. All of you stopped making noise at once, looking up at the man.

He gave you a stern look before telling you to go back to your rooms. The three of you hung your heads, defeated, but you didn’t argue. Sitting down on the floor of your room you wished you could go home. Go home to your old apartment. Where you lived next to the twins. You wished you could see your mom again. You wished you could ask her if the twins could stay for dinner, being answered with a sweet smile and an ‘of course baby’.

—

You were 15 years old. Lying face down on your bed, scribbling in a notebook. You were moving your legs back and forth as you wrote, deep in thought. Pietro was in the room with you, sitting on the floor with his back against the bed frame, bouncing a ball against the wall.

‘Y/N, can I ask you something?’

You kept your gaze on your notebook, your pen still writing away.

‘Sure.’

‘What’s going on with you and Wanda?’

You furrowed your eyebrows and looked over at him. His eyes were still focused on the ball he was throwing.

‘What do you mean what’s going on?’

He looked at you quickly before throwing the ball again. ‘I meaaaan… do you like her?’

‘Yeah.’ You laughed, looking back at him. ‘I like you too, I didn’t think this was news.’

He caught the ball one last time before turning around to face you.

‘You know what I mean!’ He laughed. ‘Do you like like her?’

Did you like like her? It was a good question. You’d been thinking about it for a while. The many hours alone in your room gave you enough time for that. But you didn’t even know what that felt like, to like someone. And you had no idea how to figure it out. You weren’t normal. No aspect of your life was normal. So part of you didn’t know what your feelings towards Wanda were. But part of you did. You felt safe around her. Warm. Like home felt when you were little. She had the power to make you feel the happiest you ever did even in this lifeless concrete building. So part of you knew. Part of you knew what these feelings meant.

‘I- I don’t know. Why? Did Wanda say something to you?’

‘No, I was just wondering.’

—

_‘Wanda just tell her already!’_

_‘Pietro let it go. I’m not gonna tell her.’_

_The twins were sitting on a couch of a common room. You were training._

_‘Why are you even _so_ sure that I have feelings for her?’_

_Pietro looked at her with a smug smile on his face._

_‘It’s a twin thing.’_

_Wanda groaned. ‘Not the twin thing… You can’t read minds Pietro. I can.’_

_‘That doesn’t matter. I know you have feelings for her. And you should tell her. We are in this crappy place because we have a goal. And you have a chance to make it a little bit easier for yourself. I don’t understand why you don’t want that.’_

_‘Fine,’ Wanda sat up a little straighter, turning towards Pietro. ‘do you wanna know the real reason I won’t tell Y/N about my feelings?’_

_‘Yes, please tell me why you don’t wanna be happy.’_

_‘Because you and her are all I’ve got in the world. I don’t wanna forget the feeling I have when I’m with her. I’m scared of telling her because I don’t know how she’ll react. I don’t wanna love her and lose her because of it.’_

_Pietro looked at his sister, his eyes bearing sympathy as she talked. He didn’t realize this was the reason why, but now that he heard he understood._

_‘Wanda I’m sorry. I know what she means to you. But you mean the same to her. I know it.’_

_Wanda huffed and slouched back into the couch. ‘Yeah right.’_

—

‘Do you plan on telling her?’ He went back to bouncing the ball, he wanted to seem casual, he didn’t want to freak you out the way he had Wanda.

‘What?’ You chuckled. ‘I’m not.’

‘Why not?’

‘Because I don’t want to freak her out.’ You sat up and leaned against the wall, looking down at your hands.

‘Who says she’s gonna freak out?’

_‘Wanda Maximoff, Pietro Maximoff, Y/N Y/L/N to Strucker’s office.’ The voice ran through the intercom._

Pietro threw the ball on to your bed before getting up. You sighed and got off the bed.

‘To be continued.’ You stuck out your tongue. He smiled and followed you out the door.

_You’re both idiots_, he thought.

—

You had turned 16 two weeks ago. A little while after Wanda and Pietro. Who had turned 16 a week after you were called into Strucker’s office. You were called in to talk about a plan. The avengers were coming to the compound, ready to take Loki’s staff and you and the twins were finally gonna be able to use your powers on them.

Everything went according to plan. Strong as the avengers were they hadn’t expected you and Pietro throwing them off their game, much less Wanda messing with their minds. Half of the team was down when they decided to retreat, the emotional manipulation by Wanda’s powers too much to handle.

You were all allowed to stay up and in each other’s rooms that night. You spent all night talking about the mission. About how confused everyone’s faces were when Pietro sped past them at the speed of light. When you used your skills to strike them from high up in the trees where they couldn’t see you, desperately looking around to find the source. How Wanda had used her powers to crack them. How happy you were that you got to hurt Stark before they left.

Pietro fell asleep curled up in a chair, the exhaustion of the day finally getting to him. You and Wanda laid face to face on your bed, still talking, although the topic of the mission was long since forgotten. It was getting late, and the day was taking its toll on you guys too. Wanda’s eyes closed and opened slowly, fatigue getting the best of her. Your faces were inches from the other, your hands between the two of you, your fingers lightly touching every once in a while. You were watching your hands when you started feeling like this was your moment. Like you had to tell her about your feelings. You were working up the nerve to tell her when you heard soft snores coming from her mouth. You looked up and smiled. Maybe it wasn’t your moment, but you couldn’t feel happier falling asleep next to her for the first time since you were 6.

—

You were 17. Ultron was over. Sokovia destroyed. You and Wanda were avengers. You lived in the compound with everyone else. Although this compound felt much warmer and lighter than the one you’d lived in before. Wanda didn’t feel the same at first. She never left her room, even though she was allowed to now. She didn’t know how to get used to being part of the team. Not really knowing who to trust.

You spent most of your time with Natasha. You’d gotten close to her as she trained you. Both of you talked to the other about your past. Her having grown up in the red room she knew exactly what you needed and what you were dealing with. You trusted her more and more each day.

Pietro spent most of his days with Clint. Having established somewhat of a foundation during the age of Ultron. They’d grown close, Clint becoming like a father figure to him.

Wanda didn’t have that sort of trust with someone yet. She talked to Steve regularly but she found it hard to really confide in him.

Tony had done his best to make you guys feel at home. He gave you big rooms and let you decorate them whoever you wanted. You spent most of your time over at Wanda’s though. Trying to lure her out of her room.

‘It’ll be fun, I promise.’

‘I think I’m just gonna stay here in my room.’

‘But it’s movie night! And it’s Sam’s turn to pick so it’ll be a good one for a change.’

Wanda chuckled at your persistence. ‘We can keep all the snacks for ourselves and make fun of the actors. If you don’t like it you can leave, promise.’

Wanda exhaled. ‘Fine.. I’ll come.’

You squealed and ran out of the room. Wanda heard a faint ‘Pietro she’s coming!’ Down the hall and she couldn’t help but laugh. Maybe you were right, maybe this was good for her. Pietro and you seemed so happy here, perhaps that could happen to her too if she gave the avengers a chance.

—

You were 18. You’d been living with the avengers for little over a year. You’d had a mission in Lagos. Everything went well until Rumlow starting talking to Steve about Bucky. He was thrown off his game. He didn’t notice the explosive Rumlow had set off. Wanda rescued Steve but ended up letting the bomb explode on to the building they were next to. The bomb blowing away half the building. Glass everywhere. Fire taking over. You looked at Wanda, her hand over her mouth as she realized what she had done.

Over the next few weeks Wanda kept to herself. You could hear her listening to the news everyday through the crack of her bedroom door. Everyone was talking about what had happened in Lagos. Calling Wanda dangerous, a hazard, a weapon of mass destruction. You walked by her room as the news reporter starting talking about the authority Wanda had, why she’s allowed to operate with the avengers. You’d hear enough. You opened the door and took the remote lying on the cabinet next to the door, turning off the TV. It was then that Wanda noticed you.

‘You should stop listening to the news, it’s not gonna make you feel better.’

‘That doesn’t mean it’s not true what they’re saying.’

‘But it _isn’t_ true.’

She laughed halfheartedly at your response and got up from her position on the edge of the bed, standing up to look out of the window. You made your way over to her, standing next to her. Her eyes were glossy and red, she’d been crying over the lives lost in Lagos.

‘They’re all saying it. They want me controlled. Locked up. I don’t blame them.’

‘They want all of us controlled. And they’re never gonna lock you up, the team will make sure of that.’

‘It’s my fault.’ She whispered.

‘You need to stop blaming yourself. You made a mistake. You were trying to save Steve. A lot more lives would’ve been lost if it wasn’t for you. Fuck what all of them are saying, they don’t know anything. You aren’t a weapon of mass destruction, you’re a human being. A really good and honest human being at that. You’re the most caring person I’ve ever met and if they don’t want to see that then that’s their problem.’

A tear made its way down Wanda’s cheek, you wiped it away with the back of your hand before pulling her into a bone crushing hug.

‘I love you.’ She whispered.

You smiled against her hair and kissed her head.

‘I love you too, more than you know.’

—

Tears made their way down you cheeks as you reminisced on the memories you had with Wanda. You were still rocking back and forth, wiping your eyes. All you wanted was to be with Wanda one last time. You missed her more and more each day you spent in this hell house. You’d even take Strucker’s compound over this, at least you’d have Wanda by your side. Bucky opened the slide door and stepped outside. Your hands were covering your face, small sobs leaving your lips. Bucky sat down next to you before wrapping his arms around your frame, rubbing his hands up and down your back soothingly.

‘It’ll be okay kid. I got you.’


	5. Chapter Four

Steam filled up the bathroom. Hot water cascading down your body as you stood. You rinsed out the last of your shampoo. Enjoying the feel of the warm water. Forgetting for a second about the world outside. You hopped out of the shower, drying yourself with one of the towels left at the house. You wiped your hand across the foggy mirror. You sighed as you mentally counted another day. ‘Day 53.’ You muttered, looking at yourself in the mirror. You got dressed and went downstairs, still drying bits of your hair with your towel.

You stepped into the kitchen. Stopping in your tracks when you saw a man that wasn’t Bucky. He turned around at your footsteps, but you were too fast. You had him pinned again the floor with one arm behind his back before your towel even hit the floor. His face pressed into the wooden floor.

‘Woah! Y/N!’ Bucky came in through the slide door. ‘He’s a shield agent. What are you doing?’

You let go of the man and stood up. ‘Shit, I’m sorry.’ You stuck out your hand and helped him up.

‘It’s alright.’ He answered, getting back up and straightening out his clothes. ‘Good to know you’re prepared for anything.’

You offered the man a cup of tea and you all sat down at the dinner table. ‘So what’s going on? Where’s fury?’

‘Fury is overseas. He sent me and a handful of other agents to reach out to everyone in the safe houses.’

‘What about the others?’ Bucky asked. You sat up straighter, could this man finally tell you anything about the others wellbeing?

‘I don’t know anything about the other safe houses. Each agent only knows the people in the safe house they’re going too. It reduces the risk of everyone being found out if one of us got captured on the way.’

You sighed and slumped back in your seat. No news. Again.

‘Then why are you here? If you can’t tell us anything?’ You asked.

‘Because I’m taking you out.’

Your eyes grew wide. You almost shot out of your seat. ‘Really?!’

‘Yes. I’m taking you to Beth Israel Hospital. We need _you_ to help us.’ He pointed his index finger towards you.

‘Me? What for?’

‘We need you to identify someone.’

‘No.’ Bucky spoke up. ‘She’s a kid. You can’t let her do that.’

‘It’s okay Buck.’

‘It’s not okay. Why do you need her to do it anyway?’

‘As Fury told us, you got a talent for knowing small details about people. It’ll help us make sure we got the right person. You’ll have to identify one person only.’

‘I’ll do it.’ You said, determined.

‘Can I speak to you, alone?’ Bucky got up and walked into the hall, you followed.

‘Y/N are you sure about this?’

‘Yes I’m sure.’

‘You do know who you’re gonna have to identify then right?’ Bucky’s voice was soft, a firm hand placed on your shoulder. Yes, you knew who you were gonna identify then. Wanda. The thought of seeing her lying there on one of those silver tables was enough to make you want to go insane. But you had to do this.

‘I have to see her again. I have to say goodbye.’

Bucky took a deep breath before pulling you into a short hug.

‘Okay. Let’s go say goodbye.’

—

The shield agent took you and Bucky to Beth Israel hospital in New York. In a car that had tinted windows, bulletproof glass, all kinds of security systems. You and Bucky were in disguises. Making your way into the hospital via a back entrance.

Inside you were met with another agent and a hospital worker, the latter of whom led you down to the morgue. He stopped in a hallway down in the basement of the hospital. Turning back to you and Bucky.

‘Whenever you’re ready.’ He stepped inside the door to his right. There was a big window right next to it. You took a few steps forward to look inside. The man was next to a table writing something down on his clipboard. The back wall was lined up with drawers. But your attention went to the silver table lined up in the middle of the room.

On the table a body was positioned beneath a white sheet. Your heart skipped a beat knowing Wanda was underneath it. You couldn’t get yourself to move. Your mind was racing. What was she gonna look like? How were you gonna react?

‘Are you ready?’

You were pulled out of your thoughts by Bucky. You turned back to him and nodded.

‘Ready as I’ll ever be.’

You reached for the door and walked inside. Bucky close on your heels.

‘Alright Miss Y/L/N, I’m going to lift up the sheet and give you some time. When you’re ready, I’d like you to point out that persons psychical characteristics. I’ll show them to you, to prove that they are who we think they are.’

You took a deep breath. Suddenly not sure if you were capable. You were about to identify the body of the girl you had been in love with since you were kids. But your body moved before your mind did. You nodded.

You stood and sighed. Preparing yourself mentally to see your best friend. The love of your life. Dead. You wiped away a few tears before straightening your back. You had to do this. You looked at the hospital worker and nodded. He took it as his sign to go ahead. He lifted up the sheet. You closed your eyes briefly until you heard Bucky whisper behind you.

‘What the hell?’

You opened your eyes and looked at him, seeing his face focused on the body in front of you. You were scared to look, afraid of what might have happened to her. Suddenly you’re not sure if this is the last memory you want to have of her.

‘Y/N, look.’ Bucky said.

You furrowed your eyebrows, curious as to what he was seeing. You looked down at the body. Expecting to be met with the body of your lifelong friend and crush. But you were staring at the face of Natasha Romanoff.

Your eyes went wide. A bunch of emotions hitting you like bullets. Shock, sadness, grief, loss and somehow.. hope.

‘Where’s Wanda?’ You asked.

‘Who?’

‘Wanda. Wanda Maximoff. She’s supposed to be here.’

‘This is the only body that was brought in.’

You looked at Bucky. Who stared, wide eyed, trying to take in all of the information given to him in the last 10 or so minutes.

‘What about the bodies brought to other hospitals? Could she be with any of them?’

‘No that’s not possible. Miss Romanoff was the only one killed that worked for SHIELD. If your friend isn’t with them that means-‘

You cut the man off before he could finish.

‘_She’s alive_.’


	6. Chapter Five

For years to come you could never quite figure out how you got from the hospital to the SHIELD headquarters, yet here you were, trying to break into Fury’s office with a frantic Bucky behind you. 

Fury’s office was only accessible via an elevator, an elevator that would only take you up to his office by his voice command. Bucky seemed to realize this when you stepped in. 

‘How are you gonna-‘ 

You cut him off by pressing the play button on a little recording device you brought with you. Upon pressing it, fury’s voice rang through the elevator stating his full name. The doors closed and the elevator started moving upwards. 

Bucky chuckled. ‘Do you just carry that around at all times?’ 

You shrugged. ‘It’s comes in handy at times.’ You smirked at him. 

The elevator doors opened and fury’s office was revealed. It was a large room, with big windows overlooking upstate New York. His desk was opposite the beautiful view, and you went straight for it as soon as you laid eyes on it. 

Pulling open all the drawers you searched for anything that had information about Wanda. You pulled out stacks of files and scanned through them, but none of them held any of the information that you needed. 

Bucky was slowly walking through the room, checking everything out. He was looking at the paintings above the couches that stood in a corner of the room when he noticed one of them had a much thicker frame than the others. He pulled the painting off the wall, revealing a safe with a pass code. 

‘Y/N, look at this.’ 

You looked up and saw the safe, abandoning the files in your hand and making your way over.

‘Bucky, you’re amazing! Let me see if I can crack this code.’ 

Minutes went by as you tried every possible code you could think of, but none of them worked. You were starting to let your mind wander to all the explosives that could get the safe to open when Bucky slowly pulled you back by the shoulder.

‘Here let me try.’ He said calmly as he put his metal hand on the safe’s handle. With one hard pull he yanked the safe door clean off its hinges. You and Bucky looked at each other, your eyes a little wide while you shrugged.

‘That works.’ 

You dove into the safe and pulled out the largest stack of files yet, dropping them on the coffee table with a loud thump. You and Bucky sat down and started looking through the pile. Most of them were of your fellow avengers and their personal history, shield business, hydra and other known enemies, everything earth knew about extra-terrestrial life. If you hadn’t been so focused on finding Wanda you would’ve had a great time reading all of this. But right now none of it mattered. You threw another stack aside until you landed on a file that read: May 29th Attack. 

You opened it, tossing aside the pages that were about the actual attack and stopping when you found the tab that held everyone’s location until your eye caught Wanda’s name.

‘I got it.’ You ripped the page from the file and ran out the door, Bucky close on your heel.

You and Bucky made your way down and into the basement where SHIELD kept all of their vehicles. You were checking out which cars were open when Bucky suddenly threw you a helmet.

‘Heads up.’ You caught the helmet and looked over at Bucky, who had his eyes set on a motorcycle. You quickly pulled the helmet over your head and sat on the back of the bike, holding on to Bucky tightly.

About an hour and a half later you arrived at a secluded ranch in the middle of nowhere. No other form of civilization could be seen. Nothing but fields for miles. The ranch looked beaten down and abandoned on the outside, but twilight had settled in, and the lights that were turned on inside showed you someone was there. Your heart suddenly started racing, all this time you had been so focused on getting to Wanda you hadn’t stopped to think what you would do once you actually did get to her. The last time you saw her you were about to kiss. Were you just going to pick up where you left off?

Bucky turned off the engine and you both stepped off, pulling your helmet over your head and looking at the ranch. The headlights of your bike must have caught the attention of the people inside, because next thing you know someone stepped outside the front door.

Bucky was a significant distance ahead of you by now. You, you realized, were still frozen to your spot.

‘Steve?’ Bucky’s step faltered upon realizing it was his lifelong friend before his pace became faster and faster. Steve had started to walk forward too, embracing his buddy when they finally met.

You could hear them talking, asking how the other was, what happened, where they stayed. But halfway through the noise faded into the background. A girl had just walked out of the house. And you didn’t have to walk closer to recognize who it was. Her fiery red hair could be seen from space. It was like the earth stopped spinning for a moment. All your nerves disintegrated and you suddenly found yourself dropping the helmet onto the grass below, your feet running forward. Wanda’s eyes widened as she realized it was you. She ran forward, jumping down the steps of the ranch’s porch before running straight into your arms.

You threw your arms around her. Wanda grabbed onto you tightly, knocking the wind out of you in the process. You were both sobbing, clinging onto each other for dear life. _Finally._ Finally, after 53 days you had Wanda in your arms again. You were afraid to let go of her, like she might be pulled away from you again if you did. The moment made you realize something. You were suddenly overcome with regret. Regret that it had taken you this long to try and kiss her when you could’ve been with her this entire time. Regret that it took you literally being pulled apart to realize that you didn’t ever want to be without her, that you couldn’t be without her. You couldn’t believe the night of the attack was the first time you tried to kiss her. And you _hadn’t_ even kissed her. You hadn’t gotten the chance. So that’s exactly what you did.

You pulled your head back, grabbing on to her cheeks and kissing her with every last bit of energy you had in you. The kiss was passionate and rough. Teeth clashed and lips bruised but you didn’t care. All you hoped was that this simple kiss somehow told Wanda everything she needed to know. How you felt about her. How much you missed her. How scared you had been that you lost her. And she did.

When you pulled back her giant eyes were glossy with tears, but the smile on her lips told you she understood. That she felt the same way. It wasn’t until then that you realized you’d been standing there for 30 minutes without either of you even saying anything. The sky had turned dark. The starts shining upon you brightly. The moment didn’t need any words at all. But you wanted to say it, you had to say it. You wouldn’t wait a moment longer to tell Wanda what she meant to you.

_‘You are the love of my life.’_


	7. Chapter Six

It wasn’t until the cold forced you to go back inside that you and Wanda made your way in. You laced your fingers together and didn’t let go. The warmth of the ranch was a nice welcome. A massive staircase faced the open front door. Wanda led you into the living room on the left. Where big and comfortable looking couches lined the walls. A coffee table stood in the middle, paintings decorated the walls. Freshly picked flowers stood in vases. It had a very homely feeling. But nothing made the room feel more like home than the people in it. The rest of the avengers, it seemed, had all been shipped off to this place. And you made your way around the room getting giant hugs from Tony, Pepper, Peter, Scott, Thor, Bruce, Sam, Steve, Clint and one of your best friends Pietro.

After you hugging Pietro you and Wanda settled on one of the couches, Bucky sitting next to you as Pepper got the both of you some hot drinks. Everyone immediately fired questions at you and Bucky, but Pepper told them off, so everyone went quiet before Tony spoke up: ‘Where have you two been?’

You looked at Bucky, who gave you a go ahead to tell the story. You told everyone about where you had been taken, how long you had been there, about Fury’s visit, everything that had happened up until the day you were brought to the hospital. You weren’t sure how to bring up the subject, until Clint made that easier on you.

‘So do you guys know where Nat is?’ Everyone’s curious eyes darted from Clint back onto you.

You took a deep breath, straightening out your back. Bucky hung his head next to you. Tears welled up in your eyes again as you remember seeing her lifeless body.

‘She-‘ you choked up. ‘She didn’t make it…’

Pepper gasped, almost dropping her mug as her eyes darted over to Tony, whose gaze hadn’t left you out of pure shock. Steve put his head in his hands. Clint tried to swallow the lump in his throat to no avail. Wanda put her hands over her mouth, you put a reassuring hand on her leg. Everyone in the room went quiet, the worst had happened. As great as it was seeing everyone else the void Natasha left behind was one you knew could never be filled again. There was a moments silence before Tony went and grabbed something from the basement.

He came back with a bottle of dusty wine. Pepper caught his drift and went to grab glasses. It was a safe house, so there were no fancy wine glasses around. Everyone instead got a mismatched old glass. Tony filled all of them with wine. Even Wanda, Pietro, Peter and you got some. Once he poured the last drink for himself everyone lifted their glasses. “To Natasha. An amazing spy and soldier. But above all, an amazing person and friend.’

Halfhearted smiles covered everyone’s faces, all of you lifted your glasses even higher before you toasted in unison. ‘To Natasha.’

—

A few weeks had gone by, everyone was still at the ranch. Tony often joked it would be better if they remodeled it and stayed there. Secretly everyone else thought the same. The serenity of the place made everyone calm and happy. Today wasn’t as happy though. Everyone had gotten dressed up and prepared for Natasha’s funeral. You all went into the woods behind the ranch. There was a little stream you and Wanda had come across a week ago, and the place was breathtakingly beautiful. It seemed only fitting you would say goodbye to Natasha in a place as beautiful as she was. You walked at the front. A bouquet of flowers in your hands. You and Pepper had prepared it, picking fresh flowers from around the ranch and weaving them around a wreath. Clint had been awfully quiet ever since he’d gotten the news, and knowing he was closest to Natasha you asked him what he thought of the flowers. He told you it was perfect, but that one thing was missing. So now, in between all the brightly colored flowers, a tiny little arrow necklace was reflecting sunlight.

Everyone gathered around a small opening in the creek, Wanda stood to your left, Clint to your right. You turned towards him and handed him the bouquet. He looked up at you, surprised.

‘It’s only right that you get to do it.’

Tears filled Clint eyes as he took the flowers from you with trembling hands. He slowly walked forward, balancing the wreath in the water to make sure it would float. You stepped over to Wanda, wrapping an arm around her back. She did the same to you before giving you a small smile.

You heard Clint let out a sigh before he finally let go. He stood back and you all watched as the flowers slowly made their way down the stream of water, further and further until they were completely out of sight.

Back at the ranch everything was set up for a dinner outside with the whole family. Two long tabled had been placed on the grass and perfectly set up with cutlery, plates, glasses and candles. In between the candles stacks of foods were placed in bowls and pots. Dinner had been going on for a while, everyone was talking amongst each other. Everyone talked about their favorite Natasha memories. The first time they met her. All sorts of funny anecdotes were told. It was a bittersweet moment. The family was together, sharing nice stories, eating good food, but saying goodbye to Nat forever was looming at the backs of everyone’s minds.

It wasn’t until the last candles had almost gone out that everyone was tired enough to go to bed. You and Wanda bid everyone goodnight before going back to your shared room. You stepped back into the bedroom, ready for bed, when you saw Wanda standing in front of the window overlooking the front of the property. You snuck up behind her, wrapping your arms around her waist. She ran her hands up and down your arms, sighing contently as her head leaned into yours.

‘You okay?’ you spoke quietly.

Wanda hummed and nodded. Slowly turning around in your arms and wrapping them around your neck before kissing you softly on the lips. ‘Always.’

You chuckled before leading her over to the bed. She fell backwards as her knees hit the mattress, you laid down next to her, lazily kissing her as you traced a hand up her shirt. As you looked into Wanda’s beautiful eyes you felt happy. Peace had been restored. Your family was back together. An important piece was missing but you knew Nat would never really be gone as long as the avengers were together. You kissed Wanda again, running a hand through her hair, you caught the familiar smell of her perfume and you smiled into the kiss. You were uncontrollably, unbelievably in love with her. And nothing or no one could ever take her away from you again.


End file.
